Perf University


the most elite university you will ever hear of. in order to get into perf university you must be able to take 7 shots without a chaser, stand on one leg while reciting the national anthem in greek, wear only sweatpants, be able to to any kristen wiig impression when asked, have the name abby, grace, aaron, taylor, kellie, zoe, or c-ssidy, and be incredibly hot.
ugh i got rejected from perf university, they said i wasn’t pretty enough to be seen on campus…

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    basically a typical creepy child rapist face. dude your neighboor has a total petaface i would watch my -ss if i were u.

  • Petting her knee caps

    to finger a girl in the v-g-n-, or rub her cl-toris. commonly derived from the movie fubar. yeah man, never banged her, i was just petting her knee caps.

  • Petting the Dog

    gently stroking of your own genitals as foreplay to masturbation or because you can not, for whatever reason, m-st-rb-t- at the time and still desire an erection “i was with d-ck and he just started petting the dog.” “i wish samantha would pet my dog, i’ve got a great dane.”

  • Petting the horse.

    the act of brushing your pubic hair. jenn: d-mn, that looks good. what did you do? john: decided it’s time to start petting the horse.

  • pex

    a pex is someone that lacks social interaction and is usually in a rehabilitation state from his earlier years of being an emo. “hey your wrist scars have almost cleared, too bad you’ll always be a pex” 3 more definitions 1. a perpetual state of being. 2. the ultimate adjective, noun, and verb. 3. a […]


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