Petaling
a very useless word to describe the obscure process of adding layers of moleskin or makeshift materials to create an ad hoc bushing for the lower rim opening of one’s medical p-n-s enlargement vacuum pump in preparation for prolonged use, or as an emergency measure to, for example, abate painful penile shaft edemas or mitigate testicular torsion and seminal vesicle ruptures, commonplace among unfortunate individuals with a thumb d-ck, so that one may resume vigorous penile pumping, effectively turning the p-n-s into a semi-resilient, flaccid superchubby resembling a miniature rancid eggplant, inevitably leading to dvt – deep vein throbosh-ts and perpetual impotence.
intercom: “dr. w-ng, please report to the north wing nurses station immediately for adolescent penile pump evacuation and flaccid priapism drainage.”
nurse: “orderly johnson, please prepare and sterilize the bone saw and hydraulic urethra lancer.”
patient: “nurse, please, the pain. i need some moleskin or at least help holding my pump upright.”
nurse: “i’m sorry, son, we do not permit petaling, perpetual masturbation or hand jobs in common areas of the pediatric ward.”
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