phatbloke

used in irony, a derogatory term that can be used to cause a seemingly fit individual to question their own set of hitherto confirmed values and beliefs without proper cause. extreme caution should be exercised; the greeting ought not to be used on a regular basis as repeated reminders might leading to eating disorders or bouts of over exercise, leading to unwanted side effects, such as hair loss, saddle rash, jogger’s nipple or a fetish for wearing padded lycra clothing and ultimately self abuse.
i greeted neddy this morning using the term ‘phatbloke’ as a form of informal address. unfortunaly however, it appears to have caused him to be consumed by guilt and loss of self-esteem. as a consequence he’s left work early to go for a swim and a bike ride. i fear that he will truly and totally f-ck himself severely and now am remorseful for my careless and frivolous actions.