Pirate Rules
the following rules apply to pirate road trips:
1. all involved dress like pirates.
2. no pirate may change their clothes or shower for the whole trip.
3. aargh! is to be said as a part of every sentence.
4. the following word subst-tutions must be made at all times:
a) car = ship or vessel
b) driver = captain
c) left = port
d) right = starboard
e) girl/woman = wench
f) steal = pillage
5. on a rotating basis, one pirate in the ship is the cabin boy. the cabin boy must do whatever anyone else tells him to do.
6. the main beverage must be rum – wenches may drnk bacardi breezers.
7. whenever there are empty bottles, it is time for cannon practice: try to hit roadsigns as you p-ss them.
8. if a pirate farts, he must call windows up. the ship windows must be rolled up, the air conditioner must be changed to recycled air, and n-body may wave the fart smell away from themselves.
(pirate rules)
non-pirate: ten slabs of beer.
pirate: argh! what be this beer of which you speak? ten bottles of your cheapest rum, check-out wench. argh.
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