plainville

also known as “genericville, ct,” plainville is a small town in central connecticut. it is home to exactly one of every known chain restaurant, dozens of neighborhoods consisting of near-identical middle cl-ss homes in varying colors, and the plainville blue devils football team, which wins exactly one game per year. the town also has an annual balloon festival, where residents of plainville and neighboring towns flock to the generic park and do absolutely nothing. important events in plainvillian history include the (fictional) syphilis epidemic of ’05 and both the opening and closing of a k-mart store. notable residents include that really old subst-tute teacher and the guy who invented sobe. local police are known for stopping drivers who go through yellow lights. local teens are known for setting homeless people on fire and eating at dairy queen five nights a week.
– where are you from?
– plainville.
– where?
– plainville.
– where?
– plai – oh, it’s near new britain/farmington/bristol/southington.
– oh yeah, i drove through there once. you guys have a dairy queen, right?
a place where nothing has ever happened, ever. the center of town is a sketchy laundromat, a run down market and that box company that everyone knows is simply a front for the cia. one time, an extra from seinfeld drove through plainville. it was awesome.

“plainville- the most accurate description of a town ever.”
a small town in plainville m-ssachusetts with a very sketchy downtown area. there’s an abandonned market where people hide drugs, an abanndoned ice cream parlor where teens hang out and smoke pot, and a town park where people fight, and do drugs. there used to be a skate park there, but it got closed down because too many people were doing drugs. the drug store got broken into, and the laundromat may or may not be a real laundromat.

the only cool thing about plainville is officer rockett.
plainville is called “the ghetto” by neighboring towns.
a small, lower-middle cl-ss suburban town in m-ssachusetts, bordered by rhode island. part of the tri-town area including wrentham and norfolk. centrally located between boston and providence. one town over from gillette stadium, home of the new england patriots.
plainville wicked sucks.
cr-ppy town in central ct where nothing ever happens.
dude, plainville sucks, man.