pod person

pod people are believed to be about 90% of the world’s population. they are of a hive mind. their emotions are limited and often go from one extreme to another. some believe the pods are a virus of this earth construct. some believe we put them into this construct to fill it up like “background people” in a movie. either way, the pods took control of the earth template constructs. at this time we cannot comment on the date the pods “overtook” us. however, for many of the “real” humans we are going to a new construct that is pod free. hope i see you there!
hey, get a load of this new marketing campaign i targeted at the average pod person “you’re a moron so buy this”.
a person pretending to be something they aren’t, or an impostor. this is inferred because of the old alien movies where alien pods appear on earth and the “pod people” dispose of the humans and slowly reproduce the bodies, pretending to be humans.
the pod person was pretending to be my father, but i knew that he was an alien when he acted differently than my father ever would have.
english t-tle of pathetic 1983 sci-fi film “los nuevos extraterrestres”.
has nothing to do with pods, and has nothing to do with people.
the target of a season 3 mst3k episode.
pod people got no reason to live.
a mindless, pliable person who cannot make an informed decision for themselves. a marketers dream. characterized by a blank glaze, frequent toe tapping and head nodding. the most distinguishing characteristic of a pod person is the white ear-buds which attach to their life support.
a pod person is most often seen on any public transit system.
someone who mindlessly goes along with the official dogma or party line. one who never questions ideas or statements or thinks for themselves preferring to p-ssively absorb ready made sound bites and pre-digested ideas.
since he became a born again christian he’s turned into a real pod person. next he’ll be chanting and burning incense.
the increasing number of people now owning ipods. these people can be seen nearly everywhere you look, and can be identified by a pod-carrying strap around their upper arm, or a long, white cord snaking out of their pockets. it’s estimated that in 7 short years, the pod people will have completely overrun all major world governments. i should know. they already got me.
we are the pod people. you will join us and will listen to over 10,000 songs at only 99 cents each. resistance is futile.
generally, pod people are considered to be smaller than normal human beings, but are an alien race living amongst us. they recharge their power cells by returning to their pods, this is something they must do at least once every week. their task in being sent to earth is to find small women who they will be able to ‘pod’ with. they then preform unknown mating rituals within the pod, resulting in new pod people, and the conversion of the human woman into a pod person, with her own pod. characteristics of pod people are: long noses, gambling, short temper, preference for feminine alcoholic drinks, large black desk chairs, small women, and going to the gym. beware of any person that fits this description, if you are a woman, men are generally safe from ‘podding,’ since the woman pod people are unable to ‘pod’ with human males.

developmental stages:
most newly born pod people cannot function outside of their pod until around 7 earth years old. they can jet around the universe at near relativistic speeds, and must settle on a planet with life by the age of 10 earth years. if they do not, then they will outgrow their pod and be forced to climb out, and die a cold death in the vast void of the universe.
if they are able to reach a planet, they will hibernate in orbit of the planet until they are exactly 10 years old in earth years. on their 10th birthday, they will crash land into the planet. upon crash landing, they will begin to grow a new, adult-sized pod, and will finish this stage after 5 more earth years. pod people emerge from undergroung on their 15th birthday. when they emerge, they will live amongst the natives, feeding on native food and trying to pod with females. they will become parasites of the dominant race of the planet, podding with females to create more pod people.
a pod person’s life span tends to exceed that of normal terrestrial species, due to the recharging abilities of the pod. but, the pod usually runs out of its recharging ability near its 500th earth year of existence, so pod people tend to die after around 515 years and 1 week of life.

if you believe to be in contact with a pod person, make sure to tell all females of the pod person’s status, and make sure that they will not ‘pod’ with them at any time. this is a parasitic race which needs to be exterminated. they have been known to use the movie ‘love actually’ as an aphrodisiac to lure females into their pod.
“wow, andrew is such a pod person, f-g.”

“god, i hate pod people”