Polar Bear Rape
the growing epidemic of people being raped by polar bears. if you see a polar bear acting in a seductive manner stay calm and don’t show any signs of returning those feelings, because you will be raped.
old man: i was out in the frozen tundra of alaska with my friend mantuck hunting alpaca when we saw a person getting raped by a polar bear.
person: —gasp—
old man: then when i was sleeping the polar bear raped me. when i called the police they said they couldn’t help.
paid actor: polar bear rape is a growing epidemic and needs to be taken seriously
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