Pre-emptive Strike
means an attack, using information gleaned from a journey in a time machine that ascertained that they would have attacked us if we hadn’t done it to them first. a term of comfort, like gay and terrorist–shows the coiner (perpetrator of the pstrike) in a good light and the victim of the strike in a bad light. an americanism, like neo-con for israeli agent in the us government.
judge: you’re charged with walking across the street and smacking this fellow in the teeth–how do you plead?
defendant: he was looking at me funny, judge. i suspected he was plotting to walk across to my side of the street and hit me. i had to hit him first, to stop him. it was a preemptive strike. not guilty.
judge: i see. i find you obviously not guilty–case dismissed.
a euphemised term of an “infamous” surprise attack like the one at pearl harbor is called when the winners are the ones who did the surprise attack and write the history books.
the u.s. did a surprise missile strike at the beginning of the iraq war known as a “decapitation attack”. shouldn’t this be a day that will live in infamy as well?
the act of spraying air fresheners in public a restroom before taking a dump.
man 1: that was a delicious taco.
man 2: sure…just make sure you do a preemptive strike before hitting the cr-pper.
the act of taking a sh-t before going to an event, in antic-p-tion of not having to hold it in uncomfortably for the next few hours otherwise.
“hey man, you wanna hit up the clubs?”
“i’m gonna take a preemptive strike, then let’s h-t it.”
the act of being unfaithful as a result of fear that one’s mate will someday be unfaithful.
my wife was afraid i was going to sleep with my secretary so she pulled a pre-emptive strike with the pool boy.
political slang used in place of other more sensitive words like kill, rape, annihilate, bomb-the-sh-t-out-of, wage-war or decimate because it pretends it is acting in defense from another country that actually poses no real threat.
dubya: i dont like saddam cuz he tried to keel’ ma daddy. lets…
rice: uh mr. president.. (shakes her head).
dubya: right…i geet it (winks and thumbs up) lets
pre-emptive strike his -ss!
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