Satantello
the fifth ninja turtle, satantello is the female cousin of donatello that wields a giant salt shaker in place of the bō staff. satantello can be identified by her obnoxiously loud snoring, and obscene scent of sewer slush and feet. this creature enjoys sleeping all day rather than fulfilling their obligations, and going on shopping sprees to buy surpluses of salt, hair oil, and candy, and being a generally unpleasant p-ssive aggressive turtle.
bystander: satantello, why are you still sleeping?! don’t you have to go to cl-ss today?
satantello: if i had a pocket full of f-cks, i wouldn’t give one.
bystander: well, satantello, would you at least mind taking a shower? your scent is rather unsettling.
satantello: f-ck nah
bystander: well, okai then, i guess.
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