semicolon

a programmer’s bane. required by most programming langauges to seperate commands. the semicolon will usually render an entire program useless and force the programmer to search every line for that godd-mn semicolon.
programmer: i wrote a program to find the answer to life, the universe, and everything and i left out a semicolon! fjsk!
microsoft word seems to think that these should go in every sentence.
what you mean to say:
“i went to the mall, however i got lost, and i had to hitch a ride with my friend, alan, who likes semicolons. the b-st-rd.”

what microsoft word says:
“i went to the mall; however, i got lost; i had to hitch a ride with my friend; alan; he likes semicolons; the b-st-rd.
a strange symbol who’s origins are cloaked in mystery. it is believed to hold magical properties but it’s true nature is still unknown mankind.

the world’s top historians have found a link that connects the birthplace of all religions back to the semicolon. the earliest semicolon discovered, on earth, dates back over 800 million years, according to paleontologists. however, images taken from the mars rover have also discovered several stone carvings of this mark.

to this date, the only use that scholars and scientists alike have been able to find for the semicolon is to combine it with other punctuation marks, like the closed parenthesis, sometimes separated by a hyphen.
oh, we;;
(d-mn you, semicolon!!!)

😉
a type of punctuation most commonly used to separate related independent clauses. they’re underused by the majority of the population; however, they are quite helpful and can be very versatile when implemented by a skilled writer.
i have written and submitted my defintion; i expect to be notified upon its addition to the site shortly.

b-tches don’t know about my semicolons; but man, those b-tches love ’em when they see ’em.
the term used to refer to erectile problems during -n-l s-x. primarily, although not exclusively, used to describe a gay man where impotency has struck during intercourse.
anthony: i’m not feeling anything anymore?
sebastian: i’m so sorry, i’ve gone limp.
anthony: a semi-colon does nothing for me, sebastian.