Slapping the Bull
the act of purposely inciting an individual or group to action, often retaliatory, through words or deeds.
in the textbook example of “slapping the bull”, the targeted individual or group (aka “the bull”) will be quietly going about their normal daily routine before being roused to action by the efforts of the person inciting the bull (aka “the slapper”).
often the slappers goal is simply to create some excitement in their otherwise boring day. the excitement can come from fending off the retaliatory response by the bull, or delighting in watching the bull unknowingly take out their aroused anger on another innocent party (the rube) who was set up to take the fall by the slapper.
the latter case is sometimes referred to as “b-tch slapping the bull”, as the bull is so completely mind f-cked by the slapper that they lash out against the slappers second target (the rube), yet another unsuspecting individual or group.
slapping the bull:
#1 – the slapper walks into the bull’s cube and from behind the bull’s back tosses an object into a nearby co-workers cube.
#2 – the attacked co-worker responds by throwing the object back into the bull’s cube knocking over the bull’s water jug and spilling water all over the bull’s clothes, keyboard and work papers.
#3 – the bull is incensed and also now busily trying to mop up the water and save his papers and electronics. retaliation is only a matter of time.
b-tch slapping the bull:
#1 – the slapper tosses an object vertically in the air such that it lands with a resounding thud on his own desk.
#2 – the slapper loudly says, “hey, whoever is throwing stuff, quit it!”
#3 – a few minutes later the slapper throws the same object from a location close to the rube’s cube into the bull’s cube and stealthily creeps back to his desk . it has the intended effect of knocking over the bull’s water jug and spilling water all over the bull’s clothes, keyboard and work papers.
#4 – the bull, now aroused to anger charges over to the rube’s cube and proceeds to dump a 64oz mug of ice water on the rube’s head.
#5 – the rube, now soaking wet, cold and p-ss–ssed mad, grabs a handy bean filled juggling bag and hurls it into the bull’s unprotected tenders.
#6 – the slapper feigns shock and surprise while desperately trying to contain their laughter as the bull and the rube tear at each other’s throats in battle reminiscent of clash of the t-tans…
masterbating…duh…what else would it mean
-what’s the best time to be slapping the bull
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