Sneeze Ninja
a sneeze ninja is an elite, considerate human being who has mastered the quick-tissue-grab move to ensure a splatter free sneeze. to be dubbed a sneeze ninja one must prove that when they feel a sneeze coming on, they will get to their face first with a tissue so their hands stay clean and germ free, even if it’s a window of less than .03 seconds.
you will never see a splatter from a considerate sneeze ninja, unless you yourself splatter: sneeze ninja will punish humans accordingly for the virus they have just inconsiderately spread.
guy on train sneezes, making no attempt at a quick-tissue-grab, instead spraying his malicious germs into the public arena.
sneeze ninja side kicks him to the face with his glad-wrapped foot, and leaves filth spreader with a packet of kleenex.
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