Sperm Toffee
toffee made out of s-m-n.
a man -j-c-l-t-s into a bowl that either a woman or a drunken man is holding. the s-m-n should then be put into a blender until it is whipped and resembles sour cream. then it should be poured back into the bowl. then the bowl is then covered by saran wrap and placed inside a refrigerator where it is left to cool. after several hours, the bowl should be removed from the fridge. then the oven should be preheated to 400-450 degrees fahrenheit. the saran wrap should be removed from the top of the bowl and the s-m-n should be poured onto a cookie pan (you can make stars or any other shapes out of it if you please). then the tray is put into the oven where it should be left for 2.5-3 hours. remove from the oven and enjoy! should be crispy and delicious! you can add any toppings you would like, i prefer sprinkles or egesta sauce.
mom: anyone hungry from a long day at school?
daughter: yeah! what kind of snacks do you have mom?
mom: your favorite! i just finished making sperm toffee!
son: yayyy, make sure to also bring the fresh egesta sauce over!
mom: good thing i bought a new bottle at the confectionery earlier today!
children: you’re the best mom!
when a woman (or man) takes sperm and thickens it through a blender, then refrigerates to let it cool. it is then shaped as desired on a piece of tin foil. then it is placed in an oven (which should be set to 450 degrees (fahrenheit)), after 3 hours it should come out warm and crispy. it is great for snacks.
tina’s specialty is caramel cl-ster sperm toffee.
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