Suburban Blues Dad

the suburban blues dad –sections 1-3:
section 1. outward appearance:
goatee/mustache combo, always trimmed to a neat level. sometimes balding and still trying to rock the long hair.
over 50, but can be as young as 35.
summer: “cargo shorts,” “mandals”, wearing a polo shirt with an embroidered company logo on it. seldom tattooed.
winter: spotless wilson’s leather, recent tour t-shirt from rush, jethro tull, and jeans are relaxed-fit and pre-faded. also seen with “dockers” trousers.
seen in brewpubs with cougar wives the only ones dancing.
section 2–instrumentation:
guitars: fender “strat” or “tele”–spotless ’57 reissue
any paul reed smith guitar
b-ss: any b-ss with over 4 strings, period.
chapman stick (anyone who plays this should be shot anyway)
amplification: trace eliot, roland jazz chorus, and/or hartke equipment.
other amps: all reissues.
drums–too many and too expensive for ability level. if he sings “harmonies” (see below) he tends toward the headset mic.
keyboards: too loud and usually sh-tty sounds.
section 3: choice of music:
always: anything srv, and/or a cover of “little wing.” also george thorogood. dead giveaway signs.
often: skynrd, and various other southern “bluesy” bands.
seldom: any song under 10 minutes.
my brother got married, had a couple of kids, moved out to woburn and became a suburban blues dad. now he plays once a month at some brewpub up there.