Sugar Land

a suburb so racially diverse the whites are flighting back to the city. it’s gotten so diverse and crime ridden, that people in the city are starting to call it gangsata land.
sugar land is so diverse white people don’t want to live there no mo.
a suburban area around houston, tx that is known for the imperial sugar plant (which is now closed) and the sugar grown there. it is also the fastest growing city in texas.

cnn/money and money magazine ranked sugar land third on its list of the 100 best cities to live in the united states. neat, huh?

contains:

1. fort bend isd. it has the most ignorant and idiotic staff and administration that really get nothing done and will eventually screw you over.

2. a large asian/indian/white population. n-body else. sorry.

3. first colony mall. it used to be mediocre, but now that they are remodeling and adding more shops, it’s starting to become much nicer. it still does not compare to the woodlands mall.

4. sugar land town center. contains restaurants, sidewalk cafes, shopping, a marriott hotel and conference center, mid-rise offices and (considerably expensive) homes, a public plaza with a fountain (with the dieing horse), and the sugar land city hall. it’s kind of like a fake corporate downtown area.

5. palm royale. the road with all those humongous houses you wish were yours. owned by celebrities such as tracy mcgrady, hakeem olajuwon, and shaquille o’neal. (all baseketball players. lol.)

6. rich kids. mostly white, these kids are mostly found crowded around a computer looking at each others drunken pictures on mysp-ce/facebook, driving their new bmws, or spending their parents money at the local mall.

7. freezing temperatures in the morning and scorching heat in the afternoon. (note: a freak snowstorm hit us on christmas eve 2004. that was pretty awesome.)

8. highway 6. the main road that goes through sugar land. most of the restaurants, businesses, and shopping can be found down this road. probably the road you can’t go one day without driving down.

9. old sugar land. can be found on the other side of highway 90. it contains sugar land business park, a lot of the older buildings and homes of sugar land, and imperial sugar plant.

also known as the bubble.
“where do you live?”

“i live in sugar land.”

“wow. -pause- …do you guys make sugar there?!”

“…f-ck you.”
a suburb of houston, texas.
facts about sugar land:
1) used to be a sugar plantation, which contained many slaves.
2) contains a sugar factory.
3) the largest growing county with pakistani/indian/asian population in texas.
4) filled with many blood sucking zombies.
5) contains douglas jeffers.
6) schools are highly over populated, and the administration believes that the “top” school should have its own student conduct book seperate from the rest of the district with an incredibly harsh no pda rule.
7) same school was seen on dr. phil with a high school teenager with a huge drinking problem.
8) filled with stalkers.
9) children that are most commonly seen: rich white kids with problems at home but cover it it up with happy smiles, and emo children.
10) children are addicted to mysp-ce, and every arguement that occurs typically starts with the words, “omg on your mysp-ce…”
11) city is rapidly growing, and is a major metropolitan suburb.
12) the new towncenter is a copy of the woodlands towncenter, but is very nice.
13) also seems like pleasantville, however has too many domestic violence.
“so this kid from sugar land came and talked to me…”
“dude was he asian?”
noun. a suburb of houston and also a state of mind. where nice people from the city are banished to when they have a baby and can’t afford/cope with memorial. full of lot-line-to-lot-line red brick georgians, home depots and olive gardens. high suicide rate. where maids and nannies don’t speak english.
virginia: did you hear? prissy and hank are going to have a baby.
steve: does that mean they have to go to sugar land?
virginia: afraid so.
steve: d-mn. they seemed like nice people..
verb: to crush with a stage
dude, did you see that! he just sugarlanded them! the humanity!!!
most black kids at the local high school try to act hood, but if you live in sugar land you don;t know the definition of hood. the tall tees and baggy jorts with the $150 jordans give away the fact that you don’t live in the hood.

the rich preppy, spoiled white girls that want to get out of the bubble and away from the drama need to realize that once they are gone sugar land will be much more peaceful and easier for the average girl that can’t afford designer jeans and four pairs of shoes a week, to live.
(sn-bby girl)- ” i can’t wait to get out of the sugar land”

(average guy)- “why do you say that”?

(sg)- ” i can’t wait to get away from my parents, live on my own and be free”

(ag)- “first of all, all college means to you is your parents will be funding your alcohol abuse, secondly youre an idiot.”
a nice little suburb of houston in texas where all the kids have loads of money and fake tans on christmas break. we all wear expensive clothes but constantly say “fml” or “i hate the world” or some other bs.
we’re all rich and beautiful and have all races living in happiness!
whites blacks hispanics and asians are abundant!

we have the occasional wigger and a few oreos (gotta love those girls) but nothing could get any better! except, if you move down here, dont bring any ghetto hoodrats.
#teamjesus
sugar landian: fml my mom didnt buy my $567.00 dress from saks and it was on sale too. i hate my life and i want to die.
houstonian: b-tch please! i’m still waiting for welfare!

←