Sweatpant Mafia


apparently the word the brits use is ‘chav.’

young british guys, usually teenagers to mid-twenties, who wear sweatpants all the time, sagged down below their skinny -sses. they are pimple-faced, have over-gel’d hair and may even have a design shaved into their hair like kanye west, or a couple of lines shaved into one or both eyebrows. they may be missing a tooth.

they will often be found on city buses accompanied by their teenage girlfriend or wife and their 2 kids. they usually wear a baseball cap turned sideways and rarely wear a coat, as hooded sweatshirts are apparently enough, even when it’s snowing out. they have an abundance of cheap-looking bling, an outdated model of cell phone and designer sneakers.

they speak in a dialect that is incomprehensible to the unsuspecting american. they are always either smoking or rolling a cigarette, or they have one tucked behind their ear for later. they can also be spotted carrying a greasy fast-food bag, presumably full of cheeseburgers for their kids.
dude, what the h-ll? why are there a bunch of puny wanna-be homies around here? they look like k-fed.

oh them, they’re part of the sweatpant mafia.

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