The Tampon
a mediocre personality, sets a poor example as a friend, widely regarded as a horrible person, an inadequate lover and definitely on the outer as a loved family member.
rarely will you find someone who likes the cut of this mans jib.
last seen taking stock of himself.
prior to that, last seen taking a good hard look at himself. it’s likely that he was the person who last saw himself, whilst taking a look at himself. because that makes sense.
nb: occasionally a good bloke but barely deserves a mention. in the interest of being balanced, he has excellent taste in choosing groomsmen for his wedding.
“gee, i hope the tampon comes out of retirement next season”
“ha! did you hear the tampon injured himself again?”
“the tampon is not a good friend but i now feel obligated to keep him around”
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