the toothpaste defense


when asked about a j-zz stain left on a sofa, t-shirt, towel, etc. one will often use the toothpaste defense
to avoid embarr-ssment, danny used the toothpaste defense when his mother inquired about the sticky white stains all over his laundry.

mom: danny, i’ve been going through your laundry, and i’ve discovered a mult-tude of sticky white stains on almost all your clothes
danny: it’s just toothpaste, ma.

wise teen: i used the toothpaste defense once, but after that i started doing my own laundry
an excuse people on probation use when they report to probation and have to do a breathalyzer and they fail. they say they just brushed their teeth, which leaves small reading of alcohol in their mouth.
probation officer: you failed your breathalyzer, you are going to jail.

probationer: no i didn’t drink, i just brushed my teeth before i came here.

probation officer: don’t try the toothpaste defense on me! you’re going to jail!

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