Timeshare

see time share time-share.

an elaborate marketing scam designed to make victims purchase property that they don’t really need. typically this scam is used in vacation/resort towns like williamsburg, myrtle beach, las vegas, and orlando. after being lured to the places with offers of “free disney tickets” or “free money”, victims are made to endure a 90-120 minute sales presentation where they are shown around a series of semi-luxurious condos or apartments, and then persuaded to purchase a property using deceptive and highly-pressurized sales pitches.
after being shown around a fairly nice-looking apartment complex, the timeshare salesman and the customer return to the main office to finalize the presentation.

timeshare rep: so, did you like the quazi glam properties?
customer: absolutely! the jacuzzi room was a nice touch, and the ocean view is spectacular.
timeshare rep: now, i need to get my double-digit sales quota today, and i’m running terribly short on time, so let’s get down to business. you said you are an engineer, and you probably make like a sh-tload of money, so how would you like to purchase an apartment for $2,899 a month for 60 months?
customer: those apartments don’t look like they cost that much!
timeshare rep: aw come on now, work with me. (scribbles on a paper) using a hooey mathematical formula i made up while showing you around, you can easily get one paid off in like, 14 months.
customer: the price still does not justify the quality.
timeshare rep: hmmm. how about i reduce the payment to $2,199 for 54 months. you can even invite your friends and relatives to rent it out and reduce your cost.
customer: let me think about it later.
timeshare rep: okay. how about $1,799 for 48 months? i’ll even throw in free maintenance and free lunches at the on-site bistro for 3 months.
customer: i still need more time to consider this.
timeshare rep: you’re breaking my b-lls here. $1,499 for 42 months, plus all of the benefits, and free heating?
customer: alright, fine. i’ll buy an apartment.
timeshare rep: great! now sign on the dotted line before my 100 minute presentation is up (hands over a doc-ment).
customer: (signng the doc-ment) now what if i change my mind and decide to cancel my payment, do i get refunded?
timeshare rep: um…..no. in fact, by signing up, you are now required to pay $2,899 up front, plus a $7,345 utility instalation fee, $13,500 pet-chauffer service, and a $1,766 asteroid-impact insurance fee.
customer: f-ck.
timeshare rep: thank you for purchasing a quazi glam property. here’s a complementary ticket to jamal’s flea market. have a nice day. sucker.
a girl who splits her time evenly amongst multiple guys. typically as a result of an agreement between a pair or group of guys.
(girl) hangs out with (guy 1) monday thru friday but since she’s a timeshare, (guy 2) has her on the weekends.