Turd Alert
an email message sent to your circle of friends at work after the discovery of brown matter that didn’t quite make it into the toilet bowl.
t-rd alert … t-rd alert … t-rd alert
alert level: brown
location: first stall, ladies room
status: uncomfirmed (sorry, even with contacts i can’t identify suspect 100%)
mo: inconspicuously positioned to the left side of porcelain goddess; proceed with caution, and avoid stall numero uno at all costs
a courtesy warning issued to a companion while walking that there is, in fact, a t-rd ahead in their trajectory.
bro, i’m not sure if that was human or dog, but thanks to your t-rd alert, i didn’t have to find out the hard way!
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