ugly cry

a type of crying that can feel really good and really bad at the same time. the ugly cry can occur after a severe tragedy in one’s life, or simply for no reason at all. you know you’re doing the ugly cry when you lose complete control of all of the muscles in your face, start heaving and making awkward sounds (even though you are trying really hard to be silent), and start leaking fluids from every opening on your face from your hairline to your chin (yes, this includes the mouth). without a doubt, by the time you are through with your ugly cry episode (if it was genuine) it will look as though you are a homeless person with pink eye who got punched a few times in the face and was h-t my a monsoon; this is completely normal (and generally the time to call up a good friend).
johnny’s mom just died, and when he tried to tell me about her, he broke into the ugly cry instead.

no movie can make you ugly cry like my dog skip.
a complete unleash of the beast with regards to crying.

the ugly cry feels great, though you may fight against it. for a woman, it usually occurs in the company of friends. for a man, it can happen while alone on the highway, during meditation or while waxing nostalgic about a recent or long past tragedy.

the ugly cry is truly ugly. if you look in the mirror while doing the ugly cry you’re bound to stop crying. unless, of course, you don’t like the way you look and then that could make you go into a further tortured, ugly cry.
babette and stud p-ss a rusted out vw on the highway.

babette: holy sh-t! did you see that guy?
stud: yup. ugly cry.
babette: poor guy…
when someone in a state of distress begins to sob, looking horribly ugly in the process.
selena: omg did you see jersey sh-r- last night? when ronnie and mike fought?

katy: yeah, sammi had the worst ugly cry i have ever seen in my life. if i hear “staaap” one more time, i’m going to kill myself.