Valentine Volcano
a volcano that spews hearts. a valentine volcano is most often seen at a senior center when two older people are very much in love, such as is seen with beatrice middleton and her boyfriend, hec hanley. a valentine volcano is very hard to stop; when it erupts, look out! your heart will be on fire.
beatrice: wow! there’s a valentine volcano out here. (she kisses hec)
hec: whoah! good one! super-charged. you know there must be tons of valentine volcanoes around here.
beatrice: look where we are. we’re at the senior center. there’s some sweet stuff going on here.
elsie: this is gonna be a great date! would you dance with me?
hec: (switches on ‘love me tender’) this is a real volcano. careful now, we’re gonna get burned!
beatrice: its not that type of volcano. would you be my valentine, sweetie? (she sits down and starts rubbing hec with some martian mud)
hec: of course i’ll be your valentine. you know i love you. we’re both former marines here. semper fi!
beatrice: yes, we almost live by the same creed. honor, courage, commitment – a gunny granny’s gotta do what a gunny granny’s gotta do! valentine volcanoes are hot!
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