Vanity Smurf
a misundersmurfed smurf. vanity is what society today would consider gay, but he’s -clearly- a metros-xual.
aside from his s-xual preferences, vanity was extremely vain -duh-. he was nowhere without his mirror, and wore a pink flower in his hat. he thought he was some hot, s-xy, b-st-rd, but in real life he looked pretty much the same as the rest of the smurfs. he had the hots for smurfette, like all the other guys in the village. he adored himself very much and kept asking painter smurf to paint his portrait. quite a flamer…
screw tinky-winky! vanity was the original girly-guy! long live vanity!!!!!!!!!
when one m-st-rb-t-s to pictures of oneself.
“how was the bar last night?”
“nothing but ditch-pigs and sloot-bogs.”
” sh-t. word?”
“ain’t nothing working. had to go home, do a harry hoodini, and give myself the vanity smurf.”
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