Ass Goblin

noun; a small (or medium if you like)gremlin-like creature who lives in your -ss and comes out every half moon to eat crackers, sometimes watching tv and hogging the remote.
“has anyone seen my -ss goblin? he’s been missing for an hour” at which point, upon retrieval, said goblin returns to his happy -ss-home.
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an -ss goblin is a mythical creature that emerges from the -n-s (or -ss). evrey once in a while it emerges, and when it does it lets out a roaring fart which kills a lot of people. the -ss goblin was once suspected of killing the dinosaurs.
scientists suspected an -ss goblin killed the dinsaurs
this is a creature that stalks u in the wee hours of the nite. they live under bridges and have an -ss for a face with sharp -ss teeth. if u come in contact with one, play dead, it will smell u and cr-p on your leg. this is its way of showing his territory.
oh my god its an -ssgoblin!!!! run!!!!!!!!
little blue critters that live in teapots and come out at night to teabag unsuspecting straight guys
“man, those -ssgoblins got me last night”

“those -ssgoblins had m-ssive b-lls”
little creatures that live in your b-tt who come out at night to steal or hide things on you.
the -ss goblins stole my anthropology paper!
one who gobbles -ss, but really just a general, whimsical “put down.” also contemporarily mythologized as goblins who inhabit the -sses of humans and presumably other creatures.

(popular source generally attributed to “beavis and b-tthead” television show)
that dude’s an “-ss goblin”
though the other definitions cover wat an -ssgoblin is, i would like to reveal their history which has been shrouded in mystery for centuries.
they were the sp-wn of some perverted leprechauns with an -n-s fetish were condemed by god to be ugly, green and lick/eat -ss for the rest of eternity. they have bred over the centuries and are located around the globe. their culture is similar to the culture of people where they live, with slight irish and -ss-worshipping rituals thrown in. when found trustworthy, they will befriend humans and sometimes inter-breed. danny devito is rumored to be one such half–ss-goblin. i know all of this from an -ssgoblin i befriended in new york. at the time i was young and knew nothing of the -ssgoblins inteligence, which is similar to humans, with the exception of annoyingly squeaky voices and -n-s-licking tendencies. different races of -ssgoblin are denoted by number of toes
my friend, ning nong the three toed -ss goblin lives in new york and has his own line of designer clothes and a pub where crossbreeds(such as danny devito) and -ss-goblins gather and converse about -sses freely