barista

pretentious sounding word used by dejected art history and drama majors that describes their employment in order to make themselves feel better about serving coffee.
-so what have you been up to since you graduated?
– i’m a barista at the coffee bean, but only until i get a sitcom.
1) a person trained in the art of preparing and serving espresso.
2) anyone who prepares and serves coffee products in a coffee shop.
(italian for “bartender.”)
it’s essential for a barista working at starbucks to know the difference between a latte and an espresso.
a person who works in a coffeeshop. more than likely, a person who puts up with large variables of bull sh-t from sn-bby customers throughout his/her work shift.
“hey, what do you do?”
“i’m a barista ”
“oh, i’m sorry…”
“yeah man…it’s okay.”
a poorly paid individual who politely endures the torture of rude posh customers every day they are at work. they are usually extremely interesting and intelligent people, yet are submitted to constant patronisation and unnecessary abuse by the individuals they serve.

identifying a barista:

they often show fabulous abilities in memory…
customer: “can i have a large extra hot soya 2 shot latte, 3 small cappuccinos, a medium wet chai latte, and a tea with 2 tea bags…to take away?”
barista: “no problem”

they are identifiable by their muscular arms built by carrying enormous trays of dishes and coffee beans across their store…
“look at those arms on her!”
“yeah, definitely a barista”

when a barista approaches, you will smell them before you see them, and can hence never be tired in their presence..
“do you mind going on the sofa tonight? you smell of coffee so much that i can’t sleep!”

they are faster than ninjas with their hands on that coffee machine…
barista: “your coffee is ready madam”
customer: “woah already? i hadn’t even reached for my purse yet!”

they are polite, despite being continually tested by rude people…
silly individual: “i want a filter coffee with no milk please”
barista: “sure, here you go – enjoy!”
silly individual: “i wanted milk with it, why are you so stupid?”
barista: “oh, i’m so sorry sir, here’s your milk”

a barista is always hard working, yet underestimated and under appreciated by many.
that girl is amazing, do you know much about her?
she’s a barista.
sn-bby f-ck who makes coffee.
that d-mn barista started yelling at me for ordering my coffee ‘to-go’.
a hipster that works at starbucks and serves coffee in uber-cool style that a hipster would.
“i’m afraid of that barista. too much hipster cr-p going on.”
“am i wearing my diaper today? i hope so because i have to get some coffee from that barista.”
“hey, when is my hipster coffee going to be ready? may as well go ask that barista.”
anyone who is a part of the baristalife family
thebaristalife.com
that guy who made my drink at starbucks def lives the baristalife