Beansworth
a saucy creature who dwells in the northern regions of california. the beansworth possesses many majestic powers, some of which include gracing the backs of weary travelers in need of healing with its gentle caress and shrieking to the sounds of “crystal blue persuasion” and minnie riperton. the beansworth enjoys concocting delicious treats for its nieces and lounging about in the negligee. the beansworth is not alone in its endeavors, however for when there are reported beansworth citing (a rare and momentous occasion for it is a stealthy, nocturnal mammal) it is often seen with its bearded companion known as the gruncle and a small, uni-balled beast with an under bite. the beansworth may seem like a busy creature, but it still recognizes the value of relaxation from time to time. in moments of stress, the beansworth will either venture to its backyard to dip itself in the swamps or luxuriate with preferred fine wines and cheeses. don’t be alarmed if you ever cross paths with this magnificent beast, for it means no harm. in fact, ready yourself for a warm embrace and a kiss. for that is how the beansworth greets visitors, without fail. but be warned, the beansworth does has an evil side. never turn your back on it or it could be h-ll to pay.
girl 1: omg guys i swear i just saw a beansworth!!
girl 2: wow! i’ve heard the legends, but never have i laid eyes on one! was it as great as i imagine??
girl 1: even better. -stares off into distance, dramatic background music playing softly-
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