bullshit detector



1. the feeling one gets when they hear an obvious or absurd lie uttered by another person.

2. the feeling one gets when facing down an extremely tough group of foes that you have little to no chance of defeating them.
1. my bullsh-t detector went off when i heard that illegal immigrants have a right to be here.

2. i am being attacked by ten juggernaughts in modern warfare 2 on veteran mode, using only an m9. bullsh-t detected!
a hypothetical, mental device that represents a person’s ability to detect deception, dishonesty, corruption, fraud, insincerity, hypocrisy and falsity in others. a person with a “built-in bullsh-t detector” usually knows when someone else is lying, or putting on a false front for appearances. these people are not easily conned, coerced, lied to, tricked or manipulated because their “bullsh-t detector” allows them to avoid falling prey to such things. these people are also often slightly cynical, extremely perceptive, intuitive, shrewd and just generally highly intelligent.

disagreeing with someone or something doesn’t mean you have a “bullsh-t detector”. a lot of people think they possess a “bullsh-t detector”, because they dislike or complain about a lot of things, or enjoy sharing their, often unpopular, opinions (in all caps) online. in reality, these people just have opinions, they are not actually good at detecting deception. in fact, they are probably more likely to be victims of the very same bullsh-t that someone who actually has a bullsh-t detector, is trying to make them aware of, but due to their reactionary natures, obtuseness, and lack of bullsh-t-detecting capabilities, they are either unwilling or incapable of accepting that they’ve been bullsh-tted on.
example 1: nellie’s new boyfriend tried very hard to make us all think he was a good guy, but i wasn’t at all surprised when he turned out to be an abusive -sshole, because my bullsh-t detector went off the moment i met him.

example 2: if all americans possessed built-in bullsh-t detectors, half of them wouldn’t have elected a sociopathic , pathological liar and conman in 2016.

example 3: if i’d had a bullsh-t detector, i wouldn’t have fallen in love with a narcissist who ended up swindling me for every penny i had. she even stole my starbursts!

example 4: “i stopped hanging out on facebook when all the gossip, drama, backstabbing, fake news, fake b-tches saying fake sh-t, -ss-kissing, bullying and pandering for popularity, caused my bullsh-t detector to overheat and then it exploded. so now i have no way of avoiding all that bullsh-t and it’s just not worth it.

dialogue example:
jenna: hi lydia! wanna hang out with me and my girl-squad?

lydia: naw, my bullsh-t-detector is telling me you’re a garbage person and i would regret it.

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