Consumerista


a caste in the new world order in which celebutantes (people famous for being famous) decide what is worthy of coolness, a commodity that is then traded for the cool product or service through the coin-of-the-realm (be it dollars, pounds sterling, euros, yen, etc.). the consumerista is a vital but lower ranking member of society, as they are not famous and therefore do not matter except as nodes on the global fiscal economy. the consumerista buys what the celebutante thinks is worthy of buying, though the actual act of buying is important in a quasi-religious sense to the consumerista but not to the celebutante, who are too busy living as royalty has always lived: pampered and overindulged. occasionally, to prevent a revolutionary act, a common “coming together” of the consumerista and their idols is staged to benefit starving children in nations that are “slave states” in all but name, receiving microfinancing loans to dig holes for water and once in a great while given solar powered computers “for educational purposes” by the gate, which are usually sold for rice to eat.
“courtney is such a good little consumerista. she read that the kardashians use heinz ketchup just like the poor, and she’s switched brands, blogged about the experience, and bought some stock in heinz. she even donated a case to the south africans–though they sent it back with a note saying they preferred hunts.”

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