desert dick

– the drought-like state of (a male) not having s-x for a protracted period of time
“he’s had a bad case of desert d-ck since he broke up with his fiancée.”
not getting any p-ssy for a very long periopd of time.
d-mn baby your going to develope some desert d-ck wile im gone!!
a man who has not had any s-xual contact for a long time making his p-n-s dried out and rinkly resembling a desert
man that dudes a desert d-ck he hasnt got p-ssy for years
when a bro somehow gets poison oak on his unit and uses medication such as pills or ointment to dry it out. resulting in your p-n-s being really dry and unrecognizable.
ay vince, cook got poison oak all over his d-ck. man, you know he’s going to have mad desert d-ck.
desert d-ck, or dds (desert d-ck syndrome) is a very serious illness that occurs in s-xually active males. the male d-ck end, or kn-b, becomes red, dry and itchy, like the desert, somtimes the skin cracks and bleeding can occur. its history is very unclear… the first case discovered was among the nates of the peguis first nation. indian folklore tells of a young boy, by the name of randy, stumbling into the forests of the peguis first nation after huffing a large amount of gas.. he was then forced give -n-l s-x to a big bear by the name of terry. randy then returned home and slept for two days without washing his p-n-s. a terrible case of desert d-ck syndrome (dds) was the result. masturbating with dds can cause a very serious illness called cactus c-ck.
guy: “no baby, we cant have s-x tonight”
girl: “why’s that baby? you cant get a hard-on?”
guy: ” i havent showered since we last f-cked, so now i’ve got the godd-mned desert d-ck…”
girl: “my god! that looks like the sahara! f-ck!”
‘desert d-ck’ or as it sometimes referred to ‘spgs’ (sandy p-n-s gulf syndrome) or ptddd (post traumatic desert d-ck disorder) first came into origin around the 1980s during the first gulf war conflict. it is the gradual build up of sand around the p-n-s glans from extended desert winds and sand storms mostly experienced by u.s. male soldiers. while it is not a malady that female soldiers can get, they are still affected by the desert d-ck syndrome. during coitus with a male soldier the female soldier can sometimes be overheard stating, “oh my g-d, that feels like sandpaper! do you have desert d-ck?” at that point you can simply ignore her, deny having desert d-ck, or simply give her a firm “camel punch” in the back of the head.
the ‘desert d-ck’ should never be confused with the ‘dessert d-ck’ which is entirely different but oft mispelled or mistaken. the ‘dessert d-ck’ involves gently laying the p-n-s on a long boat-shaped bowl, adding strawberries, banana slices, some cool whip, and gently topping your nuts with nuts.
man, i’m so tired of having desert d-ck. i could try soaking my p-n-s but i heard that there’s a sandstorm on the way so why bother??
the way your p-n-s feels and looks because of lack of v-g-n-l intercousre or maturbation. dry wrinkle cracked like a desert
yo mothaf-cka i aint got the vagine in a minute im truly rocking the desert d-ck