Drive by mooning
a mooning -ssault on innocent pedestrians or drivers. an -ssault occurs when the p-ssengers bare their bottoms out of a car window whilst slapping their bare cheeks making loud noises. the driver will normally honk his horn to gain the victims’ attention.
there are a few types of drive by moonings. a regular drive by mooning will be a prearranged -ssault on a selected location. mooning hotspots are places where large amounts of people congregate for maximum eyeful of b-m.
another type is the spontaneous mooning. this occurs on people out walking. the driver will slow to allow the mooners to disrobe as they rush to bare their bottoms before the target is reached.
another form is the double b-m offensive. this is when there is more than 1 p-ssenger in the car. 2 people allows for both sides of the car to be covered allowing for mooning on the port or starboard sides.
if 1 p-ssenger is in the shotgun position (front p-ssenger seat) it allows targets to be greeted by 2 sets of sh-t cannons (b-ms) if the target is on the correct side of the car. 1 bottom from the front and 1 from the back. when 2 bottoms are bared, this is referred to as a ‘full moon’.
there are occasions especially on a spontaneous moon that the mooners will not be able to get their pants down in time for a full-on 100% moon. if the mooners are unable to open the window in time or fully expose their bottoms, this is known as a ‘half moon’. a half moon is regarded as a fail in the mooning community.
“i was happily drinking outside the pub when i heard a car honking. i turned around to find that i had been drive by mooned”
“i was eating my hotdog quite contently until i looked up and saw a car. low and behold, i was the victim of a full moon. the full moon reminds me of cheese so i went an gorged myself on some full blown cheddar and now i’m the size of a garden shed. that full moon made me obsese!”
“it’s unbelievable. i got an eyeful of some chaps sh-t cannon as i was walking my dog. it’s the first drive by mooning i’ve ever been a victim of. it made me so mad that i choked my dog half to death.”
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