Duke Rider
(aka duke, the duke, ernie “duke’ rider, the perfect body, amway sellin’ fertilizer spewer, er)
fict-tious compilation of all the (male) characteristics of the contemporary usaf lifer/maggot.
1. self-anointed
2. unrepentant
3. all show…no go
4. fiendishly arrogant
usually found pouring coffee for higher ranking ncos at the nco club.
the breathing definition of authoritarian-screaming management.
replaces technical competence with shiny boots and buckles.
displays all awards (both real and self-awarded) on his ‘i-love-me’ wall.
underwent successful surgery for removal any form of self-effacing.
never saw combat, but talks the talk.
known to brag of having been “blessed with the perfect body.”
known to “water the eyes” of true warriors.
self-proclaimed ‘leader of tomorrow’s aerosp-ce team.’
designs and awards engraved trophies, pen/pencil sets to himself.
renown for his ‘pounding’ tactics/techniques on waf operational systems.
known for his undying effort to overcome what mommy thought of him.
sole supporter of l.e.white & sons engraving.
it’s going to be a tough mission, men. some of you won’t come back. just remember, when the going gets tough, we have duke rider back at the club pouring coffee and watering eyes. make the maggot proud!
d-mn, the new first sergeant has duke rider written all over him!
sh-t! sgt jones just went all duke rider on the new guy.
code name used by us air force enlisted members to identify a particularly unpleasant fellow aerosp-ce team member. duke rider characteristics include, but are not limited to, blatant and transparent self-promotion, loud, pretentious behavior employed to bring attention to one’s self, over-zealous enforcement to obscure regulations, full-contact sucking up to higher ranking members.
the dukes are known to design and award themselves awards/trophies/pen and pencil sets, each with their name prominently displayed.
the dukes frequent the nco club, and hover around, pouring coffee for any higher ranking ncos.
the dukes spend more on their pristine uniforms than on their children’s welfare.
the dukes personify the usaf tradition of “all show- no go.”
the dukes have never heard a weapon fired in anger, but have an endless supply of war stories.
dude, i just met the new first sergeant…. he’s full on duke rider.
you know, sergeant burton was an ok dude until he got promoted. now, he’s all duke rider and sh-t.
man, you should have seen it. two of the new guys in maintenance are trying to out-duke rider each other.
i’ve decided to get out and do the civilian thing. yesterday morning, i looked at myself and, dude, i’m telling you, i saw my duke rider training wheels in the mirror. i’m outta here!
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