dunfermline

the greatest town in scotland. a place where everyone is accepted no matter how jakie they are. the home of disco deek. the birthplace of andrew carnegie. the town where the legendary glen (pittencrieff park) is situated. which is a beautiful, large and ancient park full of exotic green houses, m-sses of trees and of course, an abundance of underage drinkers. there is allot to keep you entertained in dunfermline such as the odeon, bowlplex and many,many pubs. citizens in dunfermline are more likely to be drinking cheap cider on a sunday morning rather than attending church or doing the washing up. in dunfermline, it is completely normal to see a 12 year old hanging around one of the corner shops with a cigarette in his mouth waiting on some junkie to buy them buckfast. the average male that’s living in dunfermline will be; on the dole, spend most of his time at the pub, probably selling weed and definitely smoking it, have several kids to different woman who he only sees once a month and enjoys racist jokes and perving on young woman.
guy 1: a met this guy from dunfermline on the weekend. within 5 minutes he had already told me to get a haircut and tried to sell me soap bar.

guy 2: aww a love dunfermline. picked up this braw bird from touch last weekend. she was amazing in bed and could down a pint better than me. only 17 like, but they all start young in dunfermline.
the best place in scotland. located in east scotland.
you wanna go to ibiza on holiday ?no lets got to dunfermline instead,its well better.
a town that is messed up, yet still better than c-mbernauld.
male a: “dude i don’t wanna step near dunfermline… i’ll be mugged or something…”
male b: “man it’s there, or c-mbernauld. it’s up to you!”
male a: -sigh- “fine, let’s go. but i’m not staying long!”
place of birth of the best fitba team in europe
punter one-“wha dae you support”?
punter two-“the pars(dunfermline)min,i hate the old firm(rangers and celtic),all things weegie(glaswegian),get right intae yon falkirk b-st-rds(look up soapdodgers)
dunfermline aka sc-mfermline. home to many people born of incest. home also to the stupid and dillusional. a backwards town where the horse and cart is still the main mode of transport and where hygenie is still a mystery. a town where aeroplanes are called iron birds.
a town where hillbillys would feel superior.
and duelling banjos is the towns anthem
yuck what’s that smell? its dunfermline
the worst place in the world
your motherdunfermline
dunfermline, aka dumpfermline in fifer sc-m land, home of the biggest majority of sc-mbags in the whole of scotland, yet to discover washing and soap. they will never go anywhere and their sh-tty wee pish fitbaw team will soon go bust
1. i spent my £10 a week keep money on a ticket to see dunfermline get pumped – again

2. soap? nah i use mud