Edmonton handshake


grasp large knife. plunge said knife into someone’s chest. you have now completed the “edmonton handshake”. known as “stabbing” or “knifing” in less crime-ridden cities. most often used for no apparent reason, likely on someone elderly, smaller than you, or someone with nicer clothes than you. be especially careful of the edmonton handshake after denying an indian a cigarette.
visitor: “what the h-ll, you just stabbed me!”

edmontonian: “f-ck your innocence, and welcome to edmonton!”

paramedic: “not another edmonton handshake!”

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