Eldarkings


eldarkings would be a creature of pure annoyance. annoying because of the constant buzzing noise closely related to that of a mixture of a humming bird and a dying cat that can be heard within a 300,000 mile radius,the noise itself can cause instant insufferable bowel damage, among those of the human type. this noise is caused by the gigantic rubbing of thighs that occurs when the demon moves at the constant speed of smell. this creature is also very annoying for its horrid smell that smells similar to that of a decaying fetus mixed with a hairball. this creature has only been seen 3 times to date in the last 10,000,000 years. meeting or seeing this creature does not occur at all . . . ever, mainly because if you were to see this creature your eyes would boil out of your skull, while simultaneously contracting rabies of the third kind. also your abdomen would pulsate around three times then explode. after encountering this creature i recommend you just die, seeing how there is not much left to do.
“hey wtf is that g-dd-mn noise? oh sh-t don’t look, don’t loo. . . ohhh god my eyes. . . (inconsistent rambling followed by a rather gory explosion)” of course this occurred after seeing the creature known as eldarkings.

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