everclear

a clear liquid with the following properties:

1) 95% alcohol (190 proof). this means
1 shot everclear = about 2 1/2 shots of most other hard liquors
2) very flammable
3) has a warning on the bottle that you should not drink it straight
4) n-body really follows the above warning
5) when poured into a shot and consumed, will burn your throat like battery acid would
6) mixes very well with juice, creating a potent potable called “jungle juice”
7) most people generally underestimate its power and drink way too much, resulting in regurgitation of dinner and possible stomach-pumping
8) is not legal in many states, or in some states only in it’s 76.5% (153 proof) form
9) generally about $15 a fifth, but think how much alcohol you’re getting…
10) everclear will not get that girl drunk to the point where you can hit it. it will get her drunk to the point where she’ll puke like there’s no tomorrow and probably p-ss out. stick with regular liquor in this endeavor.
1 shot and you’ll feel like you’ve been stabbed in the throat.
2 shots is the most you should ever give a girl that you have the intention of hooking up with in the next few hours.
3 shots will probably make you puke like never before if you’re some dumb 14 year raiding your alcoholic dad’s liquor cabinet.
4 shots will send you to the er if you’re the above person.
5 shots will probably kill the same dumb kid.
6 shots will get a 200 lb. guy pretty wasted.
7 shots will make him puke.
8 shots is my personal record. it resulted in serious loss of dinner and a very bad night and morning.

if you can break double digits, i’ll either be really impressed or sending my regards to your family for the tragic loss.
195-proof grain alcohol that can run your f-cking car with. seriously. very economical in the creation of mixed drinks, as everclear contains about 250% of the alcohol in most other hard liquors, and has no taste besides that of alcohol. also, one can spit it into a flame and, quite literally, breathe fire. taking a straight shot of everclear is like swallowing oven cleaner, and has approximately the same effect on the liver.
my roommate drank ten straight shots of everclear last night, and now he’s not waking up

he’s dead, you dumb f-ck
alcholic drink that killed my brother jo-jo.
noooooo! jo-jo!!!!!!
95% alcohol more commonly know as: liquefied death
here comes the meat wagon to pick up that dumb sh-t who drank everclear…
a drink that is 95% abv (190 proof)
common side effects include but are not limited to: loss of balance, stuttering, slurred speech, unfocused sight, violently low judgement, high heart rate, tripping, paranoia, and death.
eddy: dude! last night after you p-ssed out you got up, undid your pants, attacked everyone in the room, sat on jerit’s head, and beat travis! we had to hold you down and put you back on the couch!

me: really? i don’t remember any of that sh-t! and when i p-ssed out you, jerit, and damien were gone!

travis: dude, we’re serious. and you wouldn’t talk you just grunted.

kaleb: holy sh-t. last time i drink everclear. o_o
aka “gas outta satan’s -ss.” this drink is f-ckin’ illegal in most states. a coma inducing 95% alcohol content will sh-t-can you in 2 or 3 shots. not a good thing if you want to keep taking jello shots of a chick’s t-t. bacardi 151 pales in comparison.
everclear will ice your -ss into the afterlife.
it’s h-ll the next morning
me: what the h-ll did i do last night?

friend: you had a cup of straight everclear and you had your pants down on your waist, we could see your -ss, you destroyed our toilet, and we had to hold you up while you walked so you wouldn’t fall down!

me: d-mn.

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