Faux Beard
a beard no longer than 1/2 inch long used by hipsters to get jobs in coffee shops and pick up impressionable chicks wearing converse shoes. you may not “get it” at first. if it is “hollywood scruff” and under 1/8 of an inch it does not qualify. rednecks who can’t grow beards also don’t qualify. to distinguish between the two, ask if they like the new toby keith alb-m. if they say, “who?” then you have encountered a hipster with a faux beard.
wow, that guy in the verizon 4g commercial with the rocket totally has a faux beard. i didn’t even know hipsters liked rockets.
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