Flip and rip
you’ve extolled how much better the s-x will feel without a condom on. you’ve lied profusely about getting a std test within the last week (which you either did not get or did get and subsequently failed). you even promised to pull out. but to no avail, she still insists that you “wrap it up”.
you begrudgingly agree to put on the latex raincoat, and then proceed to pleasure her in the missionary position. after a few minutes, you suggest switching it up with some doggy style. as she flips over and -ssumes her position on all fours, she will be distracted and unable to see the events that are about to unfold behind her. in one swift and discreet motion, you rip the rubber off and throw it in that crack between the bed and the wall (where it wont be found immediately after). then you proceed to raw dog her like you wanted to do in the first place. congratulations my friend. you have successfully completed the flip and rip.
bonus points if you don’t pull out and insist a few months later that she got pregnant because she had s-x with some other guy, and thereby absolve yourself of any responsibility in the matter.
you: “she wouldn’t have s-x with me unless i used a condom.”
your friend: “that sucks bro, i hate condoms.”
you: “me too. so i put one on and then did a flip and rip.”
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