Golden Machinegun
an internet meme from the valve team fortress 2 forums. a joke that one can get the golden machinegun by unlocking all the achivements . usually used to throw off “newbies” for laughs.
newbie: what do i get when i unlock all the achivements?
experienced player: oh you unlock the golden machinegun.
experienced player2: yea the golden machinegun never runs out of ammo and can kill everyone on the team in one click.
exprienced player3: the golden machinegun
a fake unlock supposedly given to team fortress 2 players who have unlocked all achievements. it is ridiculously overpowered and has the power to shut down entire servers.
the golden machine gun shoots bullets the size of bowling b-lls at twice the speed of light. this grants it the ability to kill your opponent before you actually shoot it. it also grants the user automatic aim-bot.
it was designed by saxton hale, built by chuck norris and was supplied by materials from mr.t’s hair. the exact composition of the gun consists of nonexistium wrapped in a thick coating of gold.
sadly, the golden machine gun can only be used during the set-up phase, where it can shoot through walls, and the humiliation phase, which comes right after since, if one team possesses the golden machine gun, they immediately win the round.
if both teams possesses the golden machine gun, the server shuts down and all players present at the time will have their computers explode.
the golden machine gun must always be typed in all caps or, if available, in a font of gold color.
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