Hamilton College
a small, highly selective, incredibly kick -ss college in upstate new york. known for its renown writing intensive philosophy and its extaordinarily attractive student body, hamilton college has been molding some of the brightest and most s-xually appealing americans since 1793. recently, there has been some confusion about hamilton’s incredibility as a result of colgate university achieving more popularity as a result of their division i sports programs and flamboyantly -ssertive and ambiguously h-m-s-xual students. hamilton students simply do not see the need to vocalize their superiority because the fact that they all graduate to become loaded, happy, and influential speaks for itself. literary revolutionary ezra pound, famed psychologist b.f. skinner, and jesus christ are all graduates of hamilton college.
“hi, i go to colgate university.”
“i’m sorry, i couldn’t hear you over all the sperm in your mouth. i’m going to go back to hamilton college and not have s-x with my roommate.”
an amazingly spectacular small liberal arts college located in the teeny tiny little bubble town of clinton, new york. hamilton is of course named for the foxiest of the federalists– alexander hamilton hamilton is the buff and blue continentals and competes in division 3 nescacs. in a word hamilton is unquestionably, awesome.
“question: what is the greatest college in the nation named for america’s quintessential financial bad-ss whose face currently graces the $10 bill and whose name now resonates in famous rap lyrics??”
“oh that’s easy. its all about hamilton college baby!”
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