hispanio
an infamous schizophrenic from newburyport of hispanic origin. an ordinary man by day; infamous vigiliante by night. he carries a 15 pound revolver with a scope and 1 foot long barrel. he punishes minor civil infractions with capital punishment. he ignores violent crimes almost entirely.
he justifies his drastic action based on the fact that he possesses an index card with “007” written on it. whether or not he himself wrote it is unknown.
he also is known for traveling back in time and colonizing the iberian peninsula (spain and portugal) in the name of mexico.
his theme song is known to be:
buena vista social club – candela
this can be found on youtube if you so wish.
person #1: dude, you didn’t just spit your gum on that sidewalk did you?
person #2: ya, i did, why is it a crime?
person #1: hispanio is gunna get yo.
-2 minutes later-
hispanio: in the name of justice i vanquish you, foul americano sc-m!
-guns down person #2 (the one you spit the gum on the sidewalk)-
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