john handcock

a man who frequents prost-tutes (john), but materbates on, or is m-st-rb-t-d by (handc-ck) the prost-tute, rather than having s-x with her, as a means of avoiding stds.
you: hey, john, do you wanna go to the bar?

your buddy: no, i’m going to see sharin’ c-cks, that ho down the road.

you: aren’t you afraid of aids?

your buddy: no, i’m a john handc-ck.
while c-mming onto someones face you write your name with the s-m-n. this definition makes sense because your hand is on your c-ck and there was some guy who signed some piece of sh-t called the declaration of independence and now he is some hot shot for knowing how to spell his own name, but thats another story.
after f-cking for a while max finished it off with a john handc-ck to commemorate the experience.
v.it., the act of male masturbation whilst seated on a toilet. this term originates from a play on words; one’s hand is on one’s “c-ck”, thereby conducting the act of masturbation. as this occurs, one is also seated upon a “john”, or toilet. often the physical stimuli of the act itself is inhanced by pressure on the prostate from p-ssing feces.
jonathan takes fifteen minutes every sat-rday morning to treat himself to a john handc-ck after checking the markets in the tribune.
when ur finished f-cking a girl, pull out, c-m on her chest, and use ur hands to sign your name on her chest.
after i paid her a ben franklin, i gave her a john handc-ck.