Kev


w-nker sc-m that comes froma council estate, normally wear tracksuit, gold chain and baseball cap and sh-tty trainers. think they’re solid and walk like they’re trying to keep their drugs hidden up they’re -rs-. shuld all be shot on the spot
“yeah mush, come on then u startin!”
usually go round and round the town centre in their souped up cars pumping trashy techno beats out hteir windows,perving at any girl over the age of 12, whilst ragging the f-ck out their 1.1 engines. bunch of w-nkers really.
look at that kev,you could hear him coming a mile off!w-nker!
also: chavs, scallies, townies…

these are the coolest people on earth!!! actually…nah. not at all. the opposite. they are all the most uncool people regardless of their personalities, because, lets face it, they don’t actually have personalities. the best way to describe them is to say that they only have enough brain cells to accept people who look exactly the same as they do; if they can look at a mirror and then at another human being and see a different person, it confuses them, and they lash out violently at the other person.

for this reason, all chavs look the same, with fake burberry, jewelery and tracksuits. they pay for such extravagances (in their eyes of course) with money stolen from old ladies’ handbags and government benifits (since the government are convinced that they should rob from the civilised members of society in order to give to lazy, fat yobs who can’t get off their -rs-s for long enough to even learn the english language.
‘so i was sittin on me bench, lightenin in hand, and dis bloke just laak looks at me laak y’know, so i gets up and says to ‘im “woot the fock do you think your playin at laak? you staartin wit me laak…’ and so the endless accounts of a startlingly similar nature go on until the kevs decide that socialising is too much effort so they go and rob an old lady.
noun working cl-ss teenager who enjoys hanging round on street corners and generally being a nuisance. easily identified due to their love of burberry hats, carbrining hoodys, trackies tucked into their white socks and either nike shocks or rockports on their feet. also seen in h-lly hansen and berghaus coats, depending on the weather.

synonyms include chav, townie, shaz (female)
look there go some kevs with their bottles of white lightning
a male who thinks he is ‘solid’. can often be caught making his own raps up, or rapping along to eminem and the like. also known as ‘complete and utter t-ss-rs’. skaters hate kevs / townies.
there goes another kev
a tw-t in a burberry cap from a council estate. higher cl-ss kevs often buy from prada, gucci etc. because they thing it makes them upper cl-ss.
look at the kev in the burberry cap.
a kev is a total tw-t who thinks he’s it. he usually wears trainers with springs on them (called nike shox) and scottish kilt clothing like burberry. they have a huge vendetta against rockers (who rule may i add:-d)and will get any chance to start on them. they are scrawny and scatty little tramps who think theyre 10 ft (theyre really 4ft) tall and 250 lbs and usually start on u when theyre with a group of friends. for example – year 8 boy, 4ft 6ins “yo star! you biggin up to me?” you are a 5ft 6ins guy – you dont need to.

you have to admire these kids in a way – there bravery, courage, lack of d-ck, lack of strength and of course, referring to my example, lack of height. if you know anyone hoo is indeed, a kev, use this definition to make him realise his place
based on a true story
rocker boy walking along the street, gang of 15 kevs come over
“yo, what u sayin bout ma mom?”
“er…nuffin u prik”
“dont b cheeky”
“shut up”
kevs in unison
“oooooooooooooooo, dont let him cheek u lk that!”
–rocker lashes out, kev starts cryin–
“im gonna get my big brother on u n ur family!”
cowardly innit?

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