New Years Cockswirl
an extraordinary s-xual feat done on the eve of new years. a female is bent over, near the fireplace, in front of a bay window inside a two story home. a naked male climbs the roof of the property and secures a makeshift rope out of christmas lights to a nearby tree. the new years count down begins… 10….9….8…7…6…5…4..3..2.1. at exactly the strike of midnight, the male let’s out a roar before obtaining a gargantuan sized b-n-r, swings down towards the windows, breaks through the window with his erect p-n-s, scr-pes his c-ck against the nearby christmas tree before igniting his p-b-s on fire, does a 360 can opener, and slams his c-ck into the woman’s -ss while thrusting at the same frequency as a hummingbird flapping its wings. first done by george foreman, out of frustration, in 1974 when he lost his undefeated record to muhammad ali. unfortunately, as of 2014, this s-xual feat has been banned in 49 states. leaving little rock, arkansas the only legal place for this to be performed.
john: hey billy do you mind if jenny and i stay at your place for a few months?
billy: for a few months?! what the h-ll happened to your place?
john: its burned down after i gave jenny a new years c-ckswirl.
billy: you know we live in austin, texas right? i’m calling the authorities.
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