Ockison

a severely mentally handicapped female billy goat. ockison’s are heartless, and if you ask them to a homecoming dance, chances are they will say yes and then bail on you 2 weeks before the event. they do not wear thongs because an insecure, paranoid, douche bag serial killer doesn’t allow it. sometimes ockison’s flap their ears as fast as they can, trying to fly.

on tuesday’s, ockison’s can be found painting random yard fences in small towns. when they play euchre, they become paranoid that the other team is cheating. then they get frustrated because it takes them forever to lay their cards down – because of their billy goat hooves. they want opposable thumbs more than anything in the world. simple things like turning door kn-bs, holding a shampoo bottle, and pouring milk (milk from a cow – not a goat) cannot be done easily because of their lack of thumbs. if you see an ockison on the street, please be nice. yes they can be heartless at times; but after all, they are mentally handicapped.
drew: “dude, did you see that billy goat? why in the world is it flapping its ears like that? and why isn’t it wearing a thong?”
eric: “it must be an ockison. poor thing”