Octodad


loving father. caring husband. secret octopus.
guy 1: something looks weird about that guy

guy 2: he just looks like a normal guy to me

octodad: -blub-

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    a girly girl with muscles. she’d rather get her hair and nails done than go to the gym. she’s a glamor girl with guns. she was born with biceps. she can’t get rid of her muscles no matter how hard she tries. lady diesel looks like angela b-ssett. serena williams is a lady diesel. she […]

  • shark attacking

    when a man is erect and bends backwards on all fours and walks around with his “dorsal phin” in the air. “you may make noises while doing so”. it can be done alone but preferred you have a partner to chase around. last night my boyfriend started shark attacking me. he wasn’t fully erect so […]

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    the existential crisis that results from undertaking a physics test. “i’m suffering from post-physics depression, fml” “why is johnny so quiet?” “he had a physics test last week. he’s still suffering from post-physics depression”

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    when a rather h-rny male, takes a warm batch of brownies out of the oven and sticks his schl-ng into the brownies, for a warm sensible pleasure. g-d danggit jimmy! get you schl-ng out of my brownies, you mactown brownie smusher!


Disclaimer: Octodad definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.