phonetard
n. a person who may or may not be able to perform at a functional level in society, but is unmistakably absent-minded and inconsistent in executing his or her cell phone’s most basic operations (i.e. answering incoming calls, placing outgoing calls, acknowledging the receipt of a text message with an appropriate and coherent response) and in doing so in a prompt and judicious fashion.
adj. (phonetarded)having little or no sense of proper cell phone procedures and etiquette in the context of modern society.
nate: hey rachel, have you talked to emily lately? i’ve been calling and texting her all day but haven’t been able to get a hold of her. do you think she’s ok?
rachel: yeah she’s fine. i was with her all day. she heard her phone ringing from the other room but chose not to answer it because she didn’t want to get off the couch. then, when she finally got her phone and saw that you called, she said she was going to call you back but i think she forgot that like 20 seconds later. you know she’s just a phonetard.
noun: a person behaving abnormally, usually delayed or causing delay, due to cell phone use.
traffic was moving along great until i found myself behind this total phonetard doing ten miles per hour under the speed limit.
we were leaving the movie but were stuck behind this huge, fat phonetard who was oblivious to the fact he was blocking the hallway.
also phonetardedly (adverb, as in, to drive phonetardedly)
somebody who phones you at work(system technician, for example) and annoys you with dumb questions like ”how do i log into my puder?” and ”how do i restart?”
krista doesn’t like phonetards, she doesn’t like the way they annoy her and remind her that she is at work while she is busy looking at gothic p-rn.
an individual that experiences life through the video camera function of their phone.
a video showed the recording of some “interesting” event. during that event, the filmer started filming someone else who was also filming the event. i have no doubt that the original filmer was in camera view of someone else who was also recording it. so they were filming someone, filming someone, filming an event. at some point a full loop likely transpired resulting in the original filmer or phonetard catching a glimpse of themselves through their own camera.
n. a smartphone or pda that does not operate intuitively and seamlessly with a macintosh computer.
i just got a new blackberry tour from verizon and that phonetard can’t even share music with itunes.
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