extremely obese person that happens to be in a position of slight authority and is generally irritating as sh*t because they feel the need to constantly remind you of their miniscule amount of power. the resident whale usually wears loose, unflattering clothing paired with black velcro sneakers and has made zero attempt to be stylish in any way. may smell. always has snacks on hand. derives pleasure from wasting other people’s time.
bert: hey what took you so long to get groceries?
earl: the resident whale at the store stopped me as i was leaving. told me she was “loss prevention”. she went down my entire receipt taking out every item i had in my cart to make sure i wasn’t stealing anything. that was an hour of my life i’ll never get back from that whale.
bert: what about my oreos?
earl: she needed a snack while she was f*cking me over.
bert: i’ll get the harpoons.
- mr jenkins
a person with a small p*n*s. has the ugliest family. usually a high school teacher. hairy as f*ck. usually a f*cking c*nt. mr.jenkins is a f*cking f*ggot.
a person who is a nugget muncher and likes the taste of chicken “i am a nugmunch, because i love nuggets:
a perfect girl, so perfect you wouldn’t resist her even if u tried. everyone loves her but, she’s picky with her men look at laiah! man if only she was mine
- deli is open
-refers to the fact that a girl is looking/ accepting suitors and hook up buddies. -especially when in pursuit of someone specific megan: holy sh*t maura, he’s so hot. maura: is the deli is open for him? megan: f*ck yes