Retort Tardiness


a common syndrome wherein the speaker often remembers something clever to say about 10 minutes after the conversation has ended
“the boy said ‘you git’ to the bully, but due to his retort tardiness, later reflected it would have been more accurate to have said ‘you misproportioned cankerous cretacean'”

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    someone who is an absolute stain and p-sses everyone off he or she meets. “oi mol, seen that guy at the bar in that rhinstone t-shirt sipping his stella!” “yeah smig what about him?!” “he’s a m-ssive wool!”

  • Heaven Sandwich

    recipe: toast two eggo waffles put nutella on one eggo peanut b-tter on the other eggo. mush them together, put maple syrup in between the slices. eat. i just ate the sh-t out of that heaven sandwich.

  • heidepriem

    touching another man sensually while eating a cream-cheese filled bagel. so i totally heidepriemed this asian guy at bagel boy yesterday and he choked. a s-m-n infested cesspool in arkansas. chode weiner f-cktard failure f-cking idiot so i was swimming in this heidepriem and i got aids.

  • helicopter mom

    a hovering & controlling, but well-meaning, parent who gets way too involved in her child’s life to the point of doing things that are completely inappropriate, such as personally attending all of little sweetiepie’s extracurricular activities, writing medium-sized sweetiepie’s school application essays, and submitting full-grown sweetiepie’s job applications. suzy’s job interview was rendered very awkward […]

  • masterbater

    widely uncommonly misspelt form of masturbator it’s spelt with a “u” and an “o,” idiots. being the best at bating. an absolute master, to be exact. you must not act like a douche, you must just bate. and bate well. very well. what is bating? if you do not know, you will not find out. […]


Disclaimer: Retort Tardiness definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.