Road Game
when you have to take a sh-t at a place that is not at your home, or work, family or close friend. everywhere else is playing a “road game”.
it is much more difficult to win a “road game”. your sh-t always seems to be runny or farty,and the stench is always god awful on the road. you always avoid putting yourself in this situation even if it means you drive 1 hour to sh-t at home.
1. peter was invited to a super bowl party of his boss after just one week on the job. he made the mistake of letting his roommate drive, so he was stuck. during pre-game, peter was sweating like a pig and realized he couldn’t hold his sh-t back for the f-cking 5 hour game. he was faced with an incredibly difficult “road game”.
the only bathroom accessible to the party was in the middle of the kitchen. he exploded 3 parts liquid, 1 part solid, into the pot.
needless to say peter lost. worse, the party host was out of tp in the bathroom and peter had to ask for more.
worst defeat ever. complete shutout. 77-0 final score.
2. sarah finally had to go. so kevin pulled off the jersey turnpike and sarah shat all over the stall at the mcdonalds. 28-7
3. eric’s train was 10 min away, but he couldn’t hold his sh-t any longer. this was serious, grand central terminal bathroom might be the worst on earth. but eric really had to sh-t.
eric lost. he barfed before he shat because he sat in another guys puddle of cr-p and slipped on a thick t-rd, while two guys were b-tt packing in the next stall. loss 55-3
4. ralph just met his girlfriend’s parents. yet, the taco bell wasn’t holding so a trip to the bath room to sh-t was urgent. ralph asked where it was and jenny’s parents pointed across the kitchen. for the next 15 min, ralph was farting, sh-tting and moaning as the 3 bean burritos and 2 soft tacos left his bowels. fire sauce was a bad choice.
jenny dumped ralph the next day. 28-21
when an individual spends a night away from home for reasons unrelated to business, family, friends or vacation. usually for purposes of having s-x with a straggler or strange person who is unwanted in the home.
bill: has anybody seen brad? chris: he played a road game last night with a straggler from moe’s.
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