santa’s brother
santa’s brother is a recurring character in the frankiverse. he is both a scantily clad and perverted man who wears a red attire not dissimilar to that of santa claus, and sports long black hair and huge sungl-sses. his d-ck supposedly pays his rent and has reportedly shot an old man and child in the kneecaps, but claims that it happened in florida so it was “ok”. whether the boy died as a result of his wound(s) or not remains unknown. in the video “i saw santa claus,” frank recounts how a man dressed as santa claus shot him in the kneecaps. it is therefore -ssumed that the old man santa’s brother claims he shot in the kneecaps is filthy frank himself.
the reasons he’s so f-cked up in the head is due to a brain tumor, also due to being molested by his uncle brad. it’s possible that santa’s brother is bis-xual or bicurious, as he mentioned in his song “p-ssy doe” that he sometimes thinks about d-cks, but only on “special occasions”.
his greatest hits include “p-ssy doe,” “d-ck pays rent,” “lady’s man” and “watermelon p-ssy”. his doctors say that he has polio but he doesn’t believe anyone can catch that except old farts. he sucks d-cks.
howe bo jian: haven’t u heard of santa’s brother’s “d-ck pays rent”?
fred: yeah, yeah. it was cancerous…
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